I didn't realize how active I really was until this last Sunday when I fell. All I was doing was standing up from my chair to get in the truck, when my legs gave out and I fell on top of my left knee. No... I fell on top of my twisted left knee. All of my body weight (which is still substantial) landed on top of my weakest link. I have been unable to put any weight on it ever since.
In a way I feel maybe it was meant to happen. I am grateful for not breaking any bones, and I know it could have been much worse, and although I am unable to use the leg at all and am in a lot of pain, it has given me so much perspective on my progress so far.
I have said before that it is hard to measure one's progress when you are so focused on the end goal that you just do what needs to be done to get there, like a robot, not really paying attention to how far you've come. At times I have stopped, as I've blogged about previously, and I have taken the time to really look at how far I've come. I have seen my progress, but up until now I didn't realize how much I was enjoying the journey.
This injury has made me immobile, and being immobile is making me nuts! I miss getting up and walking around the house, I miss climbing my bridge, I even miss how well I could climb the stairs into my house! I am wounded and forced to take it easy, and all I want to do is walk! I'm not allowed to do anything I was doing before until the knee heals more, and I'm frustrated.
So, I am taking that frustration and trying to see it as a good thing; making lemonade, so to speak. The good side is the frustration is actually there. I am wishing and yearning for something that is actually quite difficult and some days could seem like there was no end in sight. Just the very idea that I miss the hard work, makes this down time a little more bearable.
So, for now I am stuck licking my wounds, unable to go forward and will most likely fall backward in progress quite a bit. It doesn't take long to get weak all over again. I will just have to start from scratch, which is something I am no stranger to anyway.